olivia_sutton | This Morning's Weather and more quotes (Reply)

Hi all,

Woke up this morning to even more snow, maybe about an inch, but it was also sunny. Not partially sunny but completely and totally, blue sky sunny. 'Course that also means it's cold - really cold. Current temp from NOAA (www,noaa.gov - the US national weather service) is 24 F (-4 C).

Quotes for today are from The Piglet Files. It's a British comedy that pokes fun at MI-5 (or more precisely the very popular spy genre TV shows and movies). It's kinda' like a British Get Smart and like that classic US show, it's very funny. There were three series (or seasons) and it's available on DVD from Acorn Media (unfortunately - so no extra features and huge cases).

Note that in the pilot of The Piglet Files, Peter Chapman, newly hired by MI5, asks for a codename. Andrew gives him the codename, "Piglet", much to Peter's embarrassment. Peter is played by Nicholas Lyndhurst, Andrew by John Ringham, and Morris (Maurice?) Drummond by Clive Francis.

"How on earth are we supposed to carry out a proper recruitment program when proper information is omitted?" --Andrew Maxwell, Head of MI5
"Well, it's never stopped us in the past." --Morris Drummond
"And look who we got--Burgess, McLean, Blunt, Blake...not a decent spin bowler amongst them!" --Andrew Maxwell, "A Question of Intelligence", The Piglet Files h)(Note: spin bowling is a cricket pitch)

"Are you now or have you ever been a practising homosexual?" Andrew Maxwell, to Peter, during his job interview. A Question of Intelligence", The Piglet Files

"Finances a bit shaky, are you often short of money?" --Andrew Maxwell
"I'm a teacher." --Peter
"Yes, of course, silly question." -- Andrew Maxwell, to Peter, during his job interview. "A Question of Intelligence", The Piglet Files

"Any questions, your end?" --Morris
"I don't think so. Well, perhaps just one, there's no danger involved in any of this is there?" --Peter
"Danger?" --Morris
"I'm not likely to be shot by an enemy agent or anything?"--Peter
"Oh, good lord, no, no, no. No, you're far more likely to be shot by one of us." --Morris, during his job interview. A Question of Intelligence", The Piglet Files

Peter to himself in mirror, holding a banana: "I'm sorry, Blowfield, but this time you've gone too far, your fiendish plot to irradiate Ketering Sewage Works has been thwarted by me, Chapman, Peter Chapman. And now [clicks tongue and banana] it's time for you to die!" --Peter, A Question of Intelligence", The Piglet Files

"Well, Mr. Chapman, you've now become a small cog in the vast machine that is laughingly called British Intelligence." --Professor Shawcross, A Question of Intelligence", The Piglet Files

"I like it, a sense of humour. Yes, you're going to need that when they come around with your pay packet." --Professor Shawcross, A Question of Intelligence", The Piglet Files

"It's ironic really, but you've inherited Shawcross' job. ...Congratulations, Piglet, on your promotion." Maxwell, A Question of Intelligence", The Piglet Files

"So, any questions?" --Peter
"Could you just go back over that last bit?" --Dexter
"Sure, from where?" --Peter
"From just after you said...[looking at notebook] --Good morning, everyone." --Dexter
"That was an hour and a half ago." --Peter, "A Room with a View", The Piglet Files

"Piglet, you are just panicking!" --Andrew Maxwell (head of MI5)
"Bloody right, I'm panicking!" --Piglet
"The Ice-Man Cometh", The Piglet Files

"Good god, man, don't you realise what will happen if we combine MI5 and MI6?" --Morris
"We'd get MI-11, sir." --Dexter, "A Private Member's Bill", The Piglet Files

"You haven't quite mastered this thinking business, have you Dexter?" --Morris
"Now You See It", The Piglet Files

"Apologies, for that, Piglet, you see Special Branch thought you were one of the activists." --Morris
"I was tied to a chair with a gag in my mouth!" --Piglet
"Yes, I would have thought that would have been a bit of a clue for them, but then again, we are talking about Special Branch." --Morris
"The Beagle Has Landed", The Piglet Files

"You see, I'm not like you, sir. I find it very difficult being a bastard." --Piglet, "Piglet in a Trough", The Piglet Files

"You see, the post office caught us on the hop, we weren't properly prepared." --Morris
"Oh?" --Andrew
"Yes, well, they delivered the package the very next day-- and on time. Well, I mean, you don't expect that sort of efficiency from the post office, do you?" --Morris
"The Wright Stuff", The Piglet Files

"This is just bloody embarrassing -- two blokes from MI5 can't find MI6?" --Lewis, "The Wrong Combination", The Piglet Files

"You want me to seduce her?" --Peter (Piglet)
"No, she'll do most of that. All you have to do is lie back and think of England." --Morris, "Undercover Activity", The Piglet Files

"Now, just get in there and bonk for Britian!" --Morris, to Peter (Piglet), "Undercover Activity", The Piglet Files

Enjoy!

--Olivia